seems
gossip gossip chat
expel your black venom
of hate
 of regret
  of a nightmare
that you might be
   one day
feeling enough
 to not want gossip spread about you...

just enough time
to pop one more pill
make a few more bucks
selling
 taking
  poisioning
kids more ignorant than you
so you think but
    one day
they might tell me
 and i have the key to end your life through my almost transparent concern...

plan plan forget
who i'm supposed to be
who you told me i am
how you want things to end up
drifting
 further
  away
with every motion you make
against me in his favor
    one day
you might remember
   and i won't be here and i won't tell you it's ok...

turning too quickly
i've found myself
and i know that this is over
that your refusal to face yourself kills your beauty
that there is so much more in this life
gossip
 drugs
  boyfriends
your nonchalent approach to me
thrown back in your face
    one day
i'll look back on you all
   and wonder how i was ever so foolish as to waste that much time on your vapid breath...

nothing
despite
your words
your
promises
for love
and forever
nothing
even to you
i
am
nothing

with you
it seems
i never
get enough
of
me


(march 2003)